Friday, February 29, 2008

Silently building my cathedrals....

A friend e-mailed this to me. It is really quite timely as we are "rowing" Angelo.
(For those of you not familiar with that term, rowing is what we call doing a unit study. We use a curriculum called Five in a Row, which does unit studies based on great books. Angelo is a book about a man and a pigeon. The man's job is restoring cathedrals. It's a very sweet book.)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
INVISIBLE MOTHER

It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way
one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and ask to
be taken to the store. Inside I'm thinking, 'Can't you see I'm on the
phone?' Obviously not; no one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or
sweeping the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, because no
one can see me at all. I'm invisible. The invisible Mom. Some days I am
only a pair of hands, nothing more: Can you fix this ? Can you tie this?
Can you open this?

Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm a clock
to ask, 'What time is it?' I'm a satellite guide to answer, 'What number is
the Disney Channel?' I'm a car to order, 'Right around 5:30, please.'

I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes
that studied history and the mind that graduated summa cum laude - but now
they had disappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again. She's
going, she's going, she's gone!

One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a
friend from England . Janice had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and
she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in. I was sitting there,
looking around at the others all put together so well. It was hard not to
compare and feel sorry for myself. I was feeling pretty pathetic, when
Janice turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package, and said, 'I
brought you this.' It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe . I
wasn't exactly sure why she'd given it to me until I read her inscription:
'To Charlotte , with admiration for the greatness of what you are building
when no one sees.'

In the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I would
discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which I
could pattern my work: No one can say who built the great cathedrals - we
have no record of their names These builders gave their whole lives for a
work they would never see finished. They made great sacrifices and expected
no credit. The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the
eyes of God saw everything.

A legendary story in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the
cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny
bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, 'Why are
you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be
covered by the roof? No one will ever see it.' And the workman replied,
'Because God sees.'

I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place. It was almost
as if I heard God whispering to me, 'I see you, Charlotte. I see the
sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does. No act of
kindness you've done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, is
too small for me to notice and smile over. You are building a great
cathedral, but you can't see right now what it will become.'

At times, my invisibility feels like an affliction. But it is not a disease
that is erasing my life. It is the cure for the disease of my own
self-centeredness. It is the antidote to my strong, stubborn pride.

I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one
of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to
work on something that their name will never be on. The writer of the book
went so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in our
lifetime because there are so few people willing to sacrifice to that
degree.

When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he's
bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, 'My Mom gets up at 4 in the
morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a turkey for
three hours and presses all the linens for the table.' That would mean I'd
built a shrine or a monument to myself. I just want him to want to come
home. And then, if there is anything more to say to his friend, to add,
'You're gonna love it there.'

As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we're
doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world will
marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been
added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible women.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My prayer is that I will remember this on a daily basis and be content to silently build my own cathedrals. God has such great plans for my children. I am privileged to be part of His plans.

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Bye to a friend....


I really don't see how the military families do it. I am such a home-body. I don't think I could handle moving every few years all around the country and sometimes around the world. Let alone having dh gone for months at a time. I certainly do not have what it takes to deal with that. My hats are off to all of you military families. May God richly bless each and every one of you.

My friend Hilary and her family are moving to Texas on a military transfer. She was Joseph's assistant den leader since he was a Tiger. She did a great job! Her daughter was one of my daughter's best friends. Christalin will always remember the Build a Bear birthday/going away party that my friend's daughter had. She will always have her pink poodle to remember her by. We had a going away party at the glow-golf place at the mall with the Bear den. The boys had so much fun. We will miss Hilary and her family.

I was asked to take Hilary's place as an assistant den leader for Joseph's den. I'm excited to do it! There are ten boys in the den, so it will be a fun adventure for all.

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Acting runs in the family I guess...

Well, with the kids all doing their acting stuff, I guess I got bit by the acting bug too. I figured it was about time for me to get back into acting. The last play I did was "Cheaper by the Dozen" about five years ago! I can't believe it has been so long! I did try out for one other play within the past five years, but I didn't get a part.

I auditioned last Sunday and Tuesday the director called. I got a part! So now I will be having practices about six hours a week for a couple of months. It is a big commitment, and I only got a very small part! I figured it has been so long maybe the directors have forgotten if I can act or not! No, really a small part is ok. Since it has been so long, it will be nice to not have so many lines to memorize I only have about 15 lines. I have to memorize it by Thursday, so I should be working on that instead of blogging. Must walk away from the computer.....must walk away from the computer....

Saturday, February 23, 2008

Testing...testing...testing.... 123

Phew. I have always done an evaluation for my kids in school. By state law we either have to have an evaluation or do testing. As we're starting to prepare for college, I realized that my kids don't really have any testing experience. So this year I decided to do the CAT test with my kids.

They really did well. I will send the testing supplies back to a company and they will grade it and let me know the results. Although I haven't gotten the results yet, I already know a couple of areas where we will have to work. I pretty much knew that before testing, but it helped me come up with some ideas on how to help them. For example, since I haven't done testing before, we really haven't had to do math quickly. On the tests, I could tell the kids knew the concepts, but just weren't able to do it quickly enough. They have never been timed before. That is an area we will work on.

I like testing in February. The testing service I use is not very busy, so I should be able to get results back in a timely manner. I also know what the kids need to work on for the remainder of the year. If I did testing in June, then it would be September before we attacked the needed areas. I think next year I will bump it back so Josiah doesn't have to test on his birthday, but overall I think it was a great experience. I believe I will continue testing in the future years, rather than the evaluations. It seems to work well with our family.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

AAAH! I'm a mom of a teenager!

Wow. The years do fly by fast. Today is my oldest son's 13th birthday. I'm a mom of a teenager. That seems so old! We spent the day at grandma and grandpa's watching "Beverly Hillbillies". That show is just too funny! After cake and ice cream we went to the YMCA and the kid's played on the exercise bikes that are connected to the computer game system. I don't know what they are called, but the kid's had a great time doing it! I even gave a try on the dance game thing. (Can you tell I'm very game-illiterate?) I really did awful, but it was fun. I actually got a pretty good workout! The kids were kind enough not to laugh at me too. We also got to see the lunar eclipse. That was special to see on Josiah's birthday. All in all, it was a great day.

We're starting to talk about colleges and careers. It just doesn't seem possible that we're there already. On the down side, Josiah has a sense of not having time to deal with college and stuff. That makes my mother-heart heavy. They say that on average, kids with Cystic Fibrosis are living to be older these days. However, there still is the other half that don't make it. I can't think about that. It is too painful. Some days I see my son so very sick and I worry. Will he be able to live out his dreams? Honestly, I can't let my mind go there. God has it all in His hands. In His hands is a much better place to be than in my worrisome heart. My job is to live each day to the fullest and make memories along the way. The rest I have to leave to the Lord.

I am still getting used to being a mom of a teenager. It really isn't that bad! I am thankful that I have a teenager. It is an exciting time.

Friday, February 15, 2008

Blue & Gold Ceremony at the state Capitol



I am so proud of my boys. Joshua has bridged into Boyscouts. It was a great ceremony at the state capitol building. Josiah ended up doing the calling up the flags ceremony and part of the welcoming the troops ceremony.

The Capitol is beautiful with marble all around.

Grandpa helped Joshua make his own shadow box from scratch, and we got it done in time for the ceremony. Unfortunately, Grandpa wasn't feeling up to coming to the ceremony, but I know he was with us in spirit.



Personally, I am glad to be done with the Webelo year. As a parent and former den leader it was a difficult year. Joshua had fun though. Sometimes I think the kids would do fine if certain parents wouldn't get their noses into it! Ah well, that's life I guess. I must learn to just let it go.

I am proud that my son got the "BIG 20" badge and has bridged into Boy Scouts. The boys have picked the patrol name Phoenix. Now I have two Boy Scouts and one Bear scout. They do grow up so fast!

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Happy Valentines day!

Picture of valentines day candy hearts.



I had planned things for today, but it looks like the TO DO schedule has gotten in the way! Ugh. We are usually pretty good at keeping things balanced, but SOME days!!!

Dh stayed home from work today. He came down with the stomach flu in the middle of the night. Not a pleasant way to spend valentines! I don't know whether I should give him his chocolate ....or maybe I'd better wait. Ya think?

Tomorrow night is the Blue and Gold Banquet at the Capitol Building. It should be a very memorable event. Joshua will be bridging into Boyscouts. The kids grow up way too fast! Today we will be doing school as normal, then we might go over to my mom and dad's to work on Joshua's shadow box. It has to be done for the B&G tomorrow night. After that the boys have their woodcarving class. Then we'll go to the library and then tonight Josiah has his first job working childcare for a dessert theater. Whew! I really wanted to be able to make valentines today with the kids, but, the TO DO schedule seems to prevent that. Nasty monster!

This will be the first year dh and I will miss the dessert theater. Our budget just wouldn't allow it . I'm a bit bummed as the teens do such a great job. They have a dessert theater to make money for their mission trip and camp this summer. It works out I guess, since dh ended up being sick anyway.

So, that is a typical day around here. I bought some chocolate and a journal for each of the kids. One of the FIAR ladies had an idea of a journal notebook between mom and kids. I'll write something in their journal, put it under their pillows, and then they write back and put it under my pillow! It sounded like a great idea! It will make a neat memory for them to look back on. Plus they get a little bit of writing in as well. I hope you all have a wonderful Valentines day and give a squeeze to those you love! Don't forget what the best valentines present was and is!

For God so loVed the world,

That He gAve

His onLy

BegottE n

SoN

That whosoever

Believeth I n Him

Should N to perish,

But have Everlasting life."

John 3:16

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Happy Birthday to me!

Happy Birthday to me!!
I am soooo silly. I didn't have the guts this morning to tell my best friend that it is my birthday. However, I am posting it here for the world to see!

My dsil came over with a present. She is so great. She always remembers my birthday! However, I'm wondering what exactly she and my brother are trying to say? A couple of years ago they got me a "Denise Austin Hourglass Figure Workout ball." I actually like it! This year she gave me this real pretty sweatshirt with a matching scarf. I love it, but it is in size LARGE. She also gave me some MK cellulite reducer cream! Now I know I have gained weight over the years....but I don't think I'm fat.

Well, what is fat? Ten pounds overweight? Twenty? Thirty? Forty? More? I guess it's like when you were little you felt like older people were soooo OOOOLLLLDDDDDD. Now that I've hit my forties, the OLD age people are ever-so-much more older. Hey! That's it! OLD is fifty years older than whatever age I am! Sooo, on that note, being fat is fifty pounds over my present weight.... NNAAAAA that doesn't seem right! Anyway, I guess whatever it is, I better keep working out five days a week. I have been working out consistently four to five days a week since September. I haven't lost a pound. But, I wonder how many pounds I would have gained had I not been working out? That's a scary thought. I am having a hard time getting old!

Friday, February 8, 2008

You are not going to believe this!





Last month I blogged about an audition in Seattle that the kids went to. They had told me that they would call at the latest Tuesday, January 29. I did get a call from the school wanting both of my kids. However, at $10,000 each, it was a bit out of our budget! I didn't get a call from the agent, but I thought, well, the kids had fun anyway.

I just now got a call from the agent! He wants to represent Josiah! He told me he very rarely finds anyone from these "events". But he called Josiah a "diamond in the rough."

Omigoodness! This is Superman's agent! He wants us to put together a portfolio that he can send to his producer friends. I'm still a bit surprised. It still might not lead to anything but Wow! That is such an honor for Josiah to be asked! I'm pretty proud of him. I posted the kids pictures we used, but I had taken them down to Fred Meyer and cropped them and turned them so they looked really even nicer. What fun!